Monday, May 13, 2013

Why Are We Afraid of These People?


Check out the story below from the Associated Press:

SAUDI MAN ARRESTED AT DETROIT AIRPORT WITH PRESSURE COOKER
 
DETROIT (AP) — The nephew of a Saudi man arrested at Detroit Metropolitan Airport says the case is a misunderstanding, and that the pressure cooker his uncle was bringing for him so he could make lamb.
Nasser Almarzooq (NAH'sur ahl mar-ZOOK') told The Associated Press on Monday that he'd asked his uncle, Hussain Al Khawahir (HOO'-sayn ahl kah-WAH'-heer), to bring him a pressure cooker because the ones he bought in the U.S. didn't work.
Two pressure cookers were used in last month's Boston Marathon bombings.
Almarzooq says he's concerned about his uncle and hasn't been told anything since his Saturday arrest. Almarzooq goes to the University of Toledo and says his uncle was coming to visit him for a couple weeks.
Al Khawahir is accused of using a passport with a missing page and making false statements about why he was traveling with the pressure cooker.
 
***********************************************
 
Nephew Nasser says good ole Unk Al Khawahir (pronounced drunkenly it sounds like Ketouttahere) was just bringing a pressure cooker so he could cook a lamb....because EVERY freakin' pressure cooker in the ENTIRE United States of Blessed America doesn't work.
 
I can only imagine how the phone conversation went before Unk Al left Saudi Arabia.....
 
Nephew Nasser:  It weel be so good to see you, uncle.
Unk Al: Yes, nephew, Allahu Akbar. Is there anything I can bring from our most Allah blessed country, where Mecca is our holiest of holy sites, Sharia Law is absolute, and all non-muslims must be killed on sight....the great and glorious Saudi Arabiaaaaaaaa.
Nephew Nasser: Yes, uncle, I need for you to bring me a pressure cooker.
Unk Al: Why is that my most blessed nephew Nasser Almarzooq, Allahu Akbar? There are none in The Great Satan where you live?
Nephew Nasser: Of course, but I found out the other day in Boston they do not work so well.
Unk Al: What happened, Allahu Akbar?
Nephew Nasser: Two pressure cookers, made in The Great Satan, did not operate correctly and only 'served' three customers in a crowd of hundreds. Many people got a taste, but only three were 'full'. Do you know what I mean? They do not work so well. I believe the reason is because they were made so well the bom....er...uh....the packages did not arrive as planned.
Unk Al: I see...yes, our products are much more inferior than those of The Great Satan. It wouldn't take a very big bom....er....uh...package to see them fall to pieces.
Nephew Nasser: Exactly my point, uncle. Do you have a valid passport?
Unk Al: Yes, but I'm afraid I went to North Korea to learn more about how to make our bom....er...er..uh...packages better and more productive when they are delivered. Immigration might not let me in to see you.
Nephew Nasser: Just tear it out, uncle. The page with the stamp. They will never know. Allah will protect you.
Unk Al: Ah, nephew, you were always the clever one in the family. I shall do that and hope to see you soon. Allahu Akbar.
 
They hang up the phone and Nasser remembers something. He calls and calls but only gets Unk Al's voice mail. He finally leaves a message: "Uncle, you are bringing the pressure cooker to help me cook a lamb. Remember that." Nasser hangs up the phone and scratches his head. "I hope he gets that."
*******************************************************
 
I mean...seriously?

No comments:

Post a Comment